Saturday, September 19, 2015

Departure Eve

Right now I'm sitting up at 1:30 in the morning before I leave to France on my top bunk trying to avoid sleep. Because trying to sleep means lying still with my thoughts, and that means never actually sleeping. Because tomorrow I leave and I don't really want to leave. I've definitely never been the type of person that is excited to leave home.  I've always felt so connected to my home and my family. When I leave I fall into a frightening spiral of wondering who I am and why I'm doing what I'm doing, and having one of those sort of crises, especially in a foreign country,  is never optimal.

But, the other side of this coin is that, as my good friend reminded me over the phone the other day, I have a "team." I have a lot of people who care about me and yet are excited to see me succeed. And that makes me a little less scared, a little more okay with this next step. And I am so happy to have this team of wonderful people who are all so great in their own special ways. So I just wanted to say to all of you who are on my team and are, consequently, reading this blog: thank you so much. I love you all. Also, please write me and send me messages and tell me about your lives. Because I promise, I already miss you.

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